Saturday, May 8, 2010

Bittersweet Mother's Day

Have you ever tried to put off thinking about something only to have it push its way to the center of your mind at every oppurtunity?

Yeah. I thought so.

This past week made it a year since Mom passed away. This has been especially difficult since it falls right around Mother's Day. I haven't really looked forward to the holiday like I did in the past...

-Insert big, heartfelt sigh here.-

I tried to keep busy this week. To keep my mind filled with the both the mundane tasks and important neccessities of being a mommy, a wife, daughter and artist. This tactic held fast for a while...and then it all went kaplooey.

I was overcome. Flashes of what she looked like in the hospital as she struggled to breathe that last night....memories of her laugh and the sound of her voice (how I miss that!).....

I was in so much pain that I couldn't blog about it, but I was so overwhelmed with it that I simply blanked out when I'd try to come up with something.

I miss her. She was a wonderful Mom...and my very best friend.

Happy Mother's Day, Momma!

P.S. Happy Mother's Day, Y'all!

4 comments:

Faith said...

I'm so sorry about the death of your mother. I know that this time of year is so hard for so many. My little brother passed away two years ago and it has been very hard on my mother. I hope that in your pain you find peace.

Joanna said...

So sorry you've been overwhelmed and hurting. That's a hard place to be. Hugs to you!

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

I've been thinking about you all week...I just didn't know whether to bring it up. Does that sound dumb? I know it does. I just didn't know how to handle it so I've just been praying. Today at lunch I prayed for those who have lost their mothers this past year. We all felt the loss today..thinking of Aunt J. not being there. We love you, Anna. I so understand all those thoughts of what happened before she died, of what she was like before. . . I think I am grateful that the only way I can think of her is smiling. And her bright blue eyes twinkling.

Susan said...

Dear Anna,

I'm back. (The mom of 5 sons!)

I'm so sorry about your mom. I lost mine also. I was a young mother like you.

She was only 59.

I know the pain, the memories and heart~ache. I'm so sorry.

She will forever live on in your heart, and you will now carry on her legacy.

Blessings to you.

I'm here if you ever need to talk.