Even if it's not pretty and happy...

I've been blatantly putting off writing here, lately.

I love my blog and, most especially, love reading and commenting on what others in the blogosphere have to say and share.

I don't like to use my blog to whine or complain, gripe or moan.

Sometimes, though, the urge to do so overwhelms me...when that happens I tend to stay away from my blog. I just think that no one needs to hear me dump out my woes and indulge in a self-pity party. ;o)

However, I feel that a dose of honest sharing might be a good thing right now.

The Hubs is still in a lot of pain. There are days when he's completely unable to function. On those days, of which there are more than a few, I go between tears to a horribly potent mixture of despair, frustration and anger. Going through that much pain for as long as he has has begun taking a toll on the Hubs and I get very frustrated that it's not getting better any faster. It took the military docs far too long to diagnose this problem and now he's paying the price.

So there I stand, helpless to do anything to make it better or offer even the tiniest bit of relief.

He's such a good husband and father. I hate that this pain is making him feel like he's become less of one. It's so not true!

So, I'll pray.

I'll listen.

I'll comfort.

I'll encourage.

And, every now and then I'll share. Even if it's not pretty and happy.

Thanks for listening.

Romance...in the midst of pain.

It was tense in the living room at my parent's house for a minute or three this afternoon. The atmosphere hadn't been caused by angry words or an ugly attitude, but rather by watching Mom openly react to the pain she was in. Her face and lips were colorless, her eyes squeezed shut as she layed back in her recliner. It is a big deal for Mom to outwardly show discomfort, so as Dad and I watched and listened to her............

My Dad summed up what he and I were feeling perfectly when he walked over to her and rubbed her forehead saying, "I'd take it from you if I could." Today was their 34th wedding anniversary.

Earlier, Mom had smilingly told me that Dad had knelt down by her chair the night before and proposed to her again. "Will you marry me?" Though her face was tight with pain, her eyes twinkled and glowed as she told me about being romanced. What girl doesn't like to be courted, after all? (Yes, even us married gals, thank you very much!) She went on to tell me that he had gotten her some ferns for the porch because she'd mentioned she'd like some. He'd even come home with an Easter basket for her after church today.

Have I mentioned before that my parents are awesome?